The Story of how we Found Succulence (Where it all began)

(An excerpt from 'Succulent Wild Women', outlining some practical advice for women, suggesting them to 'bathe naked by moonlight', 'buy themselves flowers' and to shout 'im here im succulent and i'm loud." Breathtaking stuff really)

So, some of you may be wondering, why this amazement with Sark and her book? Well, we are going to let you in on the story of how we found Sark, really it was pure destiny, and now it is our mission to spread the juicyness.

One day Jam and Tam at the tender ages of around 15 decided to go shopping, bored and lacking in complete succulence. They shopped and shopped and had a pretty swell time.

(Jam and Tam having a swell time)

And then they decided to catch the bus back home, both living in Connolly. So unsure of the bus system, they didn't know which bus to get on.

Bus driver: Where do you live.

Girls (confidently): Shenton.

Meanwhile the idiots live on Hodges drive. (great work)

But you know what, it was destiny.

So anyway, the bus trip was delightful, except it took us to the wrong place and we had to embark on a treachorous journey back home. A long trek through the highway beside passing cars and through trees and bushes.

We were absolutely battered, exhausted I tell you.

But as we're walking, along the main road, with cars passing by and beeping at us, we stumble across a book. A book that looks just magical. It is full of colours and it's pretty big. On the inside it says "Succulent: ripe. Juicy. Whole. Round. Exuberant. Wild. Rich. Wide. Deep. Firm. Rare. Female."

But most interestingly, written on the first page in an array of colours is a message.

Here is an excerpt of what the message said

' To my beautiful Charlene,

life is such a wonderful thing...blah blah blah Life shouldn't be hard even though sometimes it is....

It's hard to see past the fog but im there with you! I hope this book will help you realise how special you really are and what you are capable of, simply because you are part of a flobal club of the most glorious and gracious creatures on earth, WOMEN."

"Interesting," we thought to ourselves.

(Us delighted at finding the book)

T: Look at this book, woah what is it.

J: What does Succulent mean?

T: Charlene. I wonder who Charlene is.

J: I wonder how this book got here. It's a sign it's destiny.

So, did Charlene treasure the book so much that she flung it out of her speeding car window? or had she been fulfilled and was passing it on to the next person who needed it? But who ever walks along the side of the main road in the bushes?

Anyway, Jam and Tam went back to Jam's house and then hid the book in a nearby bush for fear of someone finding it and because some of the contents seemed quite risky to be found with.

But they later went to a nearby sauna and read the wisdom. And that is the story of the destiny of us finding the book.

Now some daily wisdom from a random page... *flicks through pages*

"There are so many succulent ways to connect with women. We are all craving unusual, inspiring soulful times." - Oh indeed.

Be juicy.

J&T xox